Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
Randomize
