Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
I queefed so loud it echoed.
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
My feet surprised me
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