Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
He came home all fucked up crying slammed his bedroom door and all we could hear for about three hours was THIS ISN'T GONA RUIN MYLIFe what happend
I told him I got this chick pregnant and he has to get a new wingman
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
Randomize
