Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
An there's a little girl across the bar eating Mac n cheese... #1 she won't stop looking at me. Boo bitch I'm drinking alone. #2 I'm about to tackle her ass for that Mac n cheese.
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Randomize