hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
