You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
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