Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
Randomize
