He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
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