I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
No I am not eating basil off your cock
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
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