You don't have asthma, your pregnant
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
your brother just told me that Guinness is the first book of the Bible...
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
HEY JUST FOUND A SHIT TON OF MONEY IN THE PURSE HE SENT BRB GONNA GO BUY ME SOME MALE STRIPPERS AND BATHE IN THESE TWENTY DOLLAR BILLS
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
Shame - the story of my life.
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