There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
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