She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
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Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
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The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
Omg I joined a choir last night...
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