Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
Okay, guy from work I want to fuck just told me he liked the font on my PowerPoint presentation. It is so on.
Make me proud, climb that corporate ladder.
On the back of that comment, I've formed a theory that as a result of my brainwashing your drunk self actually believes that beards are your calling.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
Oh good, bag of butt plugs is in my predictive text now
Typing the whole thing out was getting to be such a chore
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
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