I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
I made her dinner: Beefaroni with grated parmesan cheese on top. Luckily she showed up drunk and gave me head, "For spending so much time preparing."
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
After I chugged my beer the cop slapped my ass and said "atta girl" this can't be real life.
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
Randomize
