even my farts smell like vagina
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
You said you couldn't use your body anymore so you made me push the buttons on your phone while you made alien sound effects
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.