i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
My vag should have a twitter account. It would be like "destroyed another condom today".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
Your next boyfriend should be from MENSA...you're so smart, it's intimidating as fuck. My penis retracted in fear.
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
i'm bringing homemade birthday cake and homegrown weed. how awesome is this text?
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