Who would have guessed that ordering a vodka lemonade at Roscoe's was code for I want a hand job
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
He went THROUGH MY PHONE (he's 30 for God sake) then asked me why I was stringing along 12 guys... I told him he could have just asked me if I was banging other people and then saved himself from looking at pics of dicks bigger than his.
Almost screamed "GO FISH MOTHER FUCKER" at the girl I nanny today. Drunken card games shouldn't bleed into my sober life.
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
Randomize
