I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
Do you know how awkward it is to call the bar from last night and ask if they found my leggings?
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
Got a text that the fed tax return dropped into my account just before getting on the first leg of my flights the Vegas. Fate? Viva Las Vegas!
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
Randomize
