idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
You told my mother that her salad dressing tasted like semen.
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
Randomize
