Let's just have a brief moment of silence for my dignity before we start tonight
a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
Listening to Whitney Houston sing the National Anthem while I shit before going out tonight. America.
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
I know you would never do it--but if I ever walk into your house and find a "live love laugh" ANYTHING, I will commit you to an asylum. If it is a vinyl decal adhered to the wall, I will just smother you myself.
Randomize
