she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
We should never set our expectations higher than pizza bagels cause then our night is bound to get better
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize
