i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
I just remembered that I did shots out of a gay mans crotch. And there's someone saved in my phone as "Miranda knows where my car is"
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
He just fingered me to the Lion King soundtrack. And when he left he turned dramatically and said "I'll be back after work. Be prepared." Taint ALL the childhood memories.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Randomize
