Did I ever tell you that the first person i made out with cried?
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
Randomize