cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
i'm chasing tequila w mint flavored ice cream, phil's chasing it w cream cheese, bashar's chasing it w pickles...i think we all know who the winner is....
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
When you can pee with one hand accurately while texting, you drink too much.
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
