She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
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