you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
God, you're amazing. I just want to hang out with you in the nude and watch Monty Python movies whilst we quip about how comedians just aren't as funny anymore.
Credit for originality. Points off for a mild to moderate creepy factor.
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
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