Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
Having a random hookup so left but love u
I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
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