***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
Where was Alyssa when you were sniffing the bouncer?
Passed out on some guy who looked like someone from Duck Dynasty.
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
Randomize
