Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
He sent me a snapchat of himself growing a double chin. I think we're past the stage where there's any risk of us sleeping together. Ever.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
Are you saying I'm your favorite hot mess?
I'm actually my favorite my hot mess, but you're a close second.
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
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