Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
Randomize
