apparently farting at a cop is considered assault.
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hangover cure: shower, throw up again, sleep for 4 hours, eat salsa, brush teeth. Good to go.
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My day in three words: secret purse cake
He was too drunk, and my mother and I ended up babysitting him. He told her I have amazing mouth skills, and that I love the "chorizo" he feeds me. All she said was "And on the list of 30 things you never want to hear about your daughter..." while gripping the steering wheel.Please just fucking kill me now.
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
You’re about to have a sober threesome with a rando at a Fenway bar?
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