Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
You then played what you called "a smooth jazz rendition of talk dirty to me" all thrusting your crotch at the bartender. Mom looked horrified, but my dad couldn't stop laughing
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
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