The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
Also this time, I didn't have a random creepy guy come up from behind me, grab my junk, and whisper "where's the cocaine?" in my ear. So that's also a win.
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
well, you know. whores of a feather.
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
Randomize
