dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
But I always wanted my obit to read "Died violently in casino orgy," not "Never woke up from rectal surgery."
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
i just wrote an ode to an enchilada dorito. i'll need that pregnancy test now please.
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
Randomize
