Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
You were cuddling with an eight iron and I was eating a fajita completely ignoring your presence.
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
My friend Julia's mom just called her to say she got a puzzle in the mail made of cheese and when she put it together it spelled FUCK YOU and she doesn't know who it's from.
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
Randomize
