sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
Randomize
