direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
He was the drug dealer that jumped out of his car to get my number
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
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