batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
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