its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
So the bitch asked me if I wanted the name brand or the generic contraceptive. Does it look like I want to be generically pregnant?
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
Fuckin' raining men in my bedroom while I'm trying to drunk eat a rather large portion of pasta. Like shoo I already picked who I'm sleeping with. Pasta wins.
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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