Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
There is a goat eating lettuce out of our fridge. Do you wanna grab a bloody mary?
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
How drunk are you?
Completed.
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
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