I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
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Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
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Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
I am literally so hung over that I just opened up my emergency kit, got out a survival meal replacement bar and ate it.
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
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