Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
I'm so drunk I forgot what to do to go pee.
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
Randomize
