He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
Randomize
