Your tits are I can't wait for
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
How I know I've been single too long: I'm reveling in finding out my taken friends are being tragically dumped
Randomize
