i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
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