I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
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