just heard the best thing ever: calling people's kids "fuck trophies"
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
We're too hungover to prance.
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
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