Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
Another day, another engagement, another cat
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
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