There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
Can Purell be used as lube?
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
Randomize
