I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
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I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
there are 5 pictures on my phone from last night, 4 are too blurry to recognize and the 5th is you dangling a twizzler over your mouth, naked.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
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The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
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