Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
Drunk yoga at 11 am turned into me sitting on the couch making fun of the girl in the instructional video. By the way, what the fuck is a third eye?
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
Randomize
